Tag: Believe in Yourself-Lenzspot

Posted in Celebrating Existence, Life, Love and Blessings

17 Promises I Choose to Live By : Then & Now

Posted on by rachaelathomasj

Truth be told this is my then followed by my now.

The then was created some 10 years ago:

My personal code of ethics: Statement of Purpose:

This is a personal guide which will serve as a source of inspiration and as a reminder of things I must always be mindful of, especially when I am faced with challenges. It will help me to realise my long-term goals and mirrors my beliefs and my values.

What function is this expected to serve in my life?

This will serve as a daily reminder of what I believe in and a source of encouragement that will help me to become a better well-rounded individual who endeavours to be happy, have peace of mind, and be the best that I can be. I sincerely promise to use the ‘I will’ list below to do that.

Personal Commitments

  1. I will remember, ‘Carpe diem!’ (Seize the day!) and let it be my motto.
  2. I will continue to treat others in the very same manner that I would like to be treated.
  3. I will continue to develop myself professionally.
  4. I will try to inculcate good values and morals in those I interface with (including those under my charge).
  5. I will always be mindful that some things cannot be changed; that is, not everything is within my reach, and I must accept them for what they are… simply, ‘Don’t worry about what you cannot change’ and ‘Qué sera sera!’ (Whatever will be will be).
  6. I will always thank God for my blessings. I have faced many challenges and overcome each of them—such as not being able to hold things, write properly at times, or walk properly. To date, I have 12 O’ Levels, 4 A’ Levels, a BA in English, and my BA in Mass Communication is my second degree. I have a full-time job now. I can look back and say I’m happy with some of the things I did and encourage others to turn their challenges into successes.
  7. I will continue to give credit where credit is due… everyone deserves to be appreciated.
  8. I will continue to move ahead with realistic goals. Thankfully, both my sense of maturity and being realistic have helped me value the relationships I build.
  9. I will continue to remember that everything happens for a reason… it makes it easier to walk around with less emotional baggage and eliminates chances of dumping it on others.
  10. I will continue fulfilling the responsibilities entrusted to me because shirking responsibilities means denying others their rights.
  11. I will always do my best in all that I do rather than giving up before starting or giving up in the middle of what I am doing because the end will be closer in sight.
  12. I will always look for something positive out of every negative experience, and I will use the ‘scissors of life’ to cut out negativity. Negativity breeds negativity and vice versa.
  13. I will use great care, consideration, and dedication to my values and morals to find amicable solutions to problematic situations and ethical dilemmas by always considering the consequences of my actions as it relates to all my dealings and those affected.
  14. I will focus on improving my health and try to get the required amount of rest because if I do not take care of myself, I cannot take care of anyone needing my help.
  15. I will continue to develop my spirituality and be a devotee of God.
  16. I will try to exercise good judgment at all times.
  17. I will review my personal code of ethics periodically and strive to make necessary improvements where possible.

This is my now: Living My Personal Code of Ethics

Life is about the values that guide you through both the highs and the lows. My personal code of ethics isn’t just a list I wrote once; it’s something I try to live by every day.

At the core of everything is a simple mindset: Carpe diem—seize the day. I try to make the most of every opportunity while remembering to treat others the way I would like to be treated. Respect, kindness, and fairness are not optional; they are the foundation of every meaningful interaction.

Growth is also important to me. I continue to develop myself professionally while encouraging and guiding those I interact with, especially those under my care. At the same time, I’ve learned to accept that not everything is within my control. Some things simply are what they are, and finding peace in that—embracing the idea of “what will be, will be”—has helped me tremendously.

Gratitude plays a huge role in my life. Despite the challenges I’ve faced, I remain thankful. Those experiences have shaped me, strengthened me, and allowed me to encourage others to turn their struggles into success. They remind me that resilience is built, not given.

As I move forward, I focus on being realistic, appreciating others, and valuing the relationships I build. I remind myself that everything happens for a reason, which helps me let go of unnecessary emotional weight and avoid passing negativity on to others.

Responsibility is another principle I take seriously. Fulfilling what is entrusted to me matters because failing to do so affects others. That’s why I always strive to give my best, even when it’s difficult, because every step forward brings me closer to the end goal.

I also make a conscious effort to find positivity in every situation. Life will always present challenges, but I believe in cutting out negativity and choosing a mindset that promotes growth and peace.

In dealing with others, I aim to act with care, integrity, and fairness. Ethical decisions aren’t always easy, but considering the impact of my actions helps me navigate even the most difficult situations.

Equally important is taking care of myself. I’ve learned that I cannot pour into others if I am running on empty. Rest, health, and balance are not luxuries—they are necessities.

My spirituality continues to guide me, grounding me in faith and helping me stay aligned with my values. Alongside this, I strive to exercise good judgment in all that I do.

Finally, I remind myself that growth is ongoing. I revisit my values, reflect on my actions, and make adjustments where needed. Becoming better is a continuous process, not a final destination.

Posted in Celebrating Life, Life, Life lessons, Mindset

Why “What Is” Is Better Than “What Ifs”

Posted on by rachaelathomasj

There is a quiet habit many of us fall into without even realizing it. It begins with a simple question: what if?

What if I had made a different decision?
What if I had said something sooner?
What if things had unfolded another way?
What if someone had chosen differently?

At first, these thoughts seem harmless. They feel like reflection, like the mind trying to make sense of something that did not turn out the way we once hoped. But if we are honest with ourselves, what ifs can slowly become a place where we spend far too much time.

A place where the mind keeps circling back, trying to recreate a version of life that never actually existed.

The problem with what if is that it lives entirely in imagination. It is a space where the story can always be rewritten, where the outcome can always be softer, kinder, or more favorable than what really happened. In that imagined version, the timing works out better. People say the right things. Circumstances align in ways that feel perfect.

But life rarely unfolds like that.

Real life is layered. It is complex. It carries moments of joy, moments of disappointment, unexpected detours, and lessons that sometimes only make sense much later. And that is where what is becomes far more powerful than what if.

Because what is is grounded in reality.

What is is the life you are living right now — the one shaped by every decision, every experience, every closed door and every open one. It may not always look like the version you once imagined, but it carries something much more valuable than imagination: truth.

Truth gives you something to stand on.

When you accept what is, you give yourself the opportunity to grow. You begin to see situations more clearly, without the soft filters that what if tends to place over the past. You begin to understand why certain things unfolded the way they did. Sometimes you realize that what you once thought was a loss was actually a redirection.

And sometimes you realize that the version you were holding onto in your mind was never as perfect as it seemed.

Our minds have a way of editing memories. When we think about what might have been, we often remove the difficult parts and highlight only the pieces that feel comforting. Suddenly the imagined version of events becomes far more appealing than the reality we experienced.

But that imagined version is incomplete.

It does not include the challenges that would have come along with it. It does not include the lessons you might have missed, the strength you might never have developed, or the growth that came from navigating the situation as it actually happened.

And growth is one of the most valuable gifts that what is gives us.

Life shapes us through real experiences, not imagined ones. Through moments where we learn to adapt, adjust, and sometimes rebuild. Through times where we are forced to see things differently, to let go of expectations we once held tightly, and to open ourselves to paths we had not considered before.

There is a quiet strength that comes from accepting reality as it is.

Acceptance does not mean you agree with everything that happened. It does not mean you pretend certain moments did not hurt or that disappointments did not matter. Acceptance simply means you stop trying to rewrite a chapter that has already been written.

It means you stop asking what if and begin asking, what now?

That shift is powerful.

Because the moment you start focusing on what now, your energy returns to the present — the only place where real change can actually happen.

You begin to notice the opportunities that exist right in front of you. The small openings that were always there but may have gone unnoticed while your attention was focused on the past. The new connections, ideas, and possibilities that can only emerge when you are fully present in the life you are living.

And sometimes, as time passes, something surprising happens.

You begin to see that the life you once questioned has quietly become a life that fits you better than the one you imagined. The detours that once frustrated you start to make sense. The doors that closed reveal the paths they cleared for you to walk.

Not everything that did not happen was meant to happen.

Not every opportunity that slipped away was meant to stay.
Not every person who left your life was meant to remain in your story.

Some things were simply stepping stones — moments that guided you toward where you were meant to be next.

That is why what is holds so much quiet wisdom.

It grounds you in the present. It invites you to learn from what has already unfolded. It allows you to build something meaningful from the life you are actually living rather than the life that only exists in imagination.

And when you begin to truly embrace what is, something within you softens.

You stop fighting the past.
You stop measuring your life against imagined outcomes.
You stop carrying questions that can never truly be answered.

Instead, you begin to appreciate the richness of the life that is unfolding right now — imperfect, surprising, and sometimes even better than what you once thought you wanted.

Because the truth is, the present moment holds far more possibility than what if ever will.

What if can only look backward.

But what is has the power to move your life forward.

Posted in Life lessons, Mindset, personal growth, self-care

Celebrating Truth: Respect Costs Nothing, But Means Everything

Posted on by rachaelathomasj

You ever notice how a few simple words can completely change someone’s day? A kind tone, a little patience, a bit of respect—it goes a long way. And yet, somehow, it’s also one of the easiest things for people to forget.

Treating others the way you want to be treated isn’t just some old saying we leave behind in primary school—it’s a principle that actually shapes the kind of person you become. The way you speak to people, the way you respond when you’re annoyed, the way you carry yourself in everyday interactions… all of it matters more than we sometimes realize.

Because here’s the truth—people may not remember every single thing you say, but they will always remember how you made them feel.

And let’s talk honestly for a moment about something we see way too often— speaking down to others. That tone. That attitude. That subtle (or not-so-subtle) feeling of “I’m better than you.” It might seem small in the moment, like just a quick reaction or a passing comment, but it leaves a lasting impression. Words have weight, and when they’re delivered with disrespect, they can stick with someone far longer than intended.

Sometimes people speak down to others without even realizing it. Maybe it comes from frustration, stress, or even insecurity. But no matter the reason, it doesn’t make it right. Everyone deserves to be spoken to with basic human decency—no exceptions.

Respect isn’t something you give only to people you like, or people who have a certain status, or people who can benefit you. Real respect is consistent. It shows up in how you treat the cashier, the classmate who struggles, the coworker who made a mistake, or even the stranger who crossed your path for just a moment.

Being kind and respectful doesn’t make you weak—it actually shows strength. It takes maturity to pause before responding harshly. It takes self-awareness to check your tone. And it takes character to choose kindness, even when you’re not in the best mood.

Think about it—how do you feel when someone speaks to you with attitude? When they dismiss you, belittle you, or make you feel small? It doesn’t feel good. So why pass that feeling on to someone else?

Treating others the way you want to be treated is really about empathy—putting yourself in someone else’s position, even if just for a second. It’s about asking yourself, “Would I be okay if someone spoke to me this way?” And if the answer is no, then you already know what needs to change.

The world is already filled with enough negativity, criticism, and pressure. You don’t have to contribute to that. In fact, you have the power to do the opposite—to be someone who lifts others up instead of tearing them down.

And here’s something important—being respectful doesn’t mean letting people walk all over you. You can still set boundaries. You can still stand up for yourself. But there’s a difference between being firm and being disrespectful. One shows confidence, the other reflects poor character.

5 Simple Ways to Treat People Better:
• Pause before you respond – Not every reaction needs to be immediate. Take a second to think about your tone.
• Watch how you speak, not just what you say – Your delivery matters just as much as your words.
• Put yourself in their shoes – A little empathy can completely change your response.
• Be polite in small moments – Saying “please,” “thank you,” and “excuse me” still matters.
• Correct without belittling – You can address mistakes without making someone feel small.

At the end of the day, how you treat people says more about you than anything else ever could. It reflects your values, your mindset, and the kind of energy you bring into the world.

So choose your words carefully. Choose your tone wisely. Choose kindness, even when it’s not the easiest option.

Because it truly costs you nothing to treat people right—but it can mean everything to someone else